Wednesday, December 28, 2011

The desk from heaven

I’ve finally cleared my desk at work - a task I’ve been avoiding for obvious reasons. There were a fine array of useful items, including:

12 Sketchbooks
Vintage pencil sharpener
Telescopic fork
28 Unused pencils
Vintage enamel ‘Red Head Matches’ sign
Twinkle’s old laptop casing, covered in 497 stickers
Tin of Butter Cookies (full)
5 Vintage car badges
Toaster recycled as a desk tidy
3 Vintage postcards
3 Green plastic soldiers
9 Books, 4 Unread magazines
Pair of 1971 coconut shell headphones
Diamond encrusted handbag hook
2 Remote controlled helicopters
London Underground Oyster Card, framed with RIP inscription
Small painting of a jar of Marmite
6 Original photographs
Water pistol
Badge reading ‘Hello, Very Busy, Very Important’
Sign reading ‘Guest Instructor’
Knight in shining armour (plastic)
Kangaroo, Osterich and Kiwi (plastic)
A Harajuku Hello Kitty
Small wooden oven containing wooden fish
Vintage desk calendar
Miniature camera
3 Ultraman monsters
3 Pinky Street figurines
5 Kinder Egg toys
Vast array of Lucky Dip vinyl toys
Tin of Mock Duck
Philips head screwdriver
Novelty USB humping dog
£1.25
25c (Australian)
Diamond encrusted ‘S’
Fimo poo (hand made)
1 hour parking road sign
Large plastic fish
Giant marmite jar
Cup Noodle (made by me in Osaka)
Cup Noodle clockwork puzzle
Hand made chef bear
Hand made pair of rollerskating stockings
Kewpie doll wearing no pants
Novelty erasers
Nestle Milky Bar Kid badge, and 8 other assorted badges
Japanese throwing star
Detailed map of Tokyo (in Japanese)
Bear, with biro disguised as bears tail
Pack of Flash floor clearer - circa 1970
2 Explicit language rubber stamps
Clockwork car
Minny toy with bowler hat, brief case, Samurai sword and carrot
London Bus drinks coaster
Eiffel Tower model, with Union Jack attached with cocktail stick
640 page, 2 inch Webster’s English dictionary

I sat at work today, wondering how on earth to concentrate with so much blandness looking back at me. The glare began to hurt my eyes by around 3pm...


Before:

After:




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